Who Gives This Lady Away

ONE of the responsibilities of ministerial work is performing weddings, and in every wedding there is something I do all the time. I get to the place in the ceremony where I say, “Who gives this lady away to be married?” Generally, it’s the father or some surrogate for the father who has positioned himself by the daughter and an exchange takes place. The father or surrogate then says, “I do.”

Now I have bad news for the dad. Once he says, “I do,” he can go sit down.

I’m through with him. I will have no other conversation with him in the whole ceremony. Why? Because he’s irrelevant now.

Because in that ceremony, the man, the bridegroom, will then come and replace the father. The two of them will come up before me and I will go through the wedding vows.

They will exchange the rings and then I will close the ceremony by saying, “I now pronounce you husband and wife.” The audience will then stand and receive the new couple.

That young lady has been transformed. She has been transformed not because she’s a different lady but because she has a new identity now.

When she came into the building, she was Jane Somebody. But once she has been presented by her father, she comes under a new authority and enters into a new relationship.

The first man is now overruled by a younger, newer man, strictly for one reason and one reason alone: the young lady has transferred identities. The Bible says that you have transferred identities and when that old man called the flesh starts telling you what to do, you are supposed to tell it, “I have a new hubby now.

I am married to a new lover now. I’m wearing a new ring now. I have a new name now.”